Feeling good by doing good
Here in the Netherlands, the first week of November is the yearly collection week for Alzheimer’s charity. Alzheimer’s is the most common form of dementia. My mother was suffering from this dehumanizing disease and passed away in 2010. It was only logical for me to donate to the Alzheimer’s charity. Later, I wanted to help out more than automatically wiring money, so I became a collector. That means I get this classic collection box and go around the neighborhood ringing as many doorbells as possible.
On the first day of the collection week, I always have to force myself to go out. That’s because I feel uncomfortable asking other people for money. But as soon as I’m on the road, I have memorable encounters that are heart-warming and keep me going.
Here’s a random selection from the last two years for your amusement and inspiration…
Money issues
Many people have to hunt for the last cash in the house, and the whole family is often deployed. Relieved, they put their last coins in the collection box. Everybody is happy because every bit helps!
For a few years, it has been possible to pay via mobile, thanks to a QR code on the collection box. That works pretty smoothly, although some people struggle more than others. Helping them out operating their phone without making it an uncomfortable experience is an exciting challenge.
Animals
Cats sometimes try to escape. I even escorted a cat from one neighbor to its owner next door this evening.
Dogs are primarily curious. One dog enjoyed being outside so much that he refused to go inside. The owner had no option but to drag the dog back over the doorstep.
The front door opened, and a curious dog enthusiastically greeted me. His owner followed him outside to pick him up and get him back inside. With the dog in his arms, he looked for his wallet but quickly realized this would not work. He immediately had a solution ready: “Do you want a dog?” I kindly thanked him; it wouldn’t fit.
Children
A mother opened the front door, and her three young kids, all dressed in pajamas, came to check out what was happening. The eldest must have been around 8–9 years old and asked why I was there. Her mother immediately spotted the educational opportunity, and we started talking. It was very nice to see the interest of these children, and for me, it was an exciting challenge to keep the dementia story comprehensible for these kids. I had to round up our lovely little chat to continue my round.
I rang the doorbell and heard the voices of several children running through the house. It wasn’t long before a little girl appeared, curious and certainly not afraid. She peeked at me through a small window next to the front door. From that scout post, she passed my description on to her mother, which was quite funny. When the mother opened the door, and I had my say, she was happy to donate. “I’ll just close the door; otherwise, the children will run away.” I could imagine all sorts of things about that. A little later, after sliding a banknote into the collection box, she asked: “What was the charity again?” How generous!
I rang the doorbell and heard children’s voices again upstairs. It was rush hour. The front door opens, and in front of me stands a woman wrapped in a large towel. “We were just taking a bath,” she apologizes. I was surprised she even bothered to open the door! We started talking, and it turned out that we had both lost our mothers to Alzheimer’s — yet another beautiful conversation. Because I didn’t want her to catch pneumonia, I kindly said goodbye.
Personal
You meet other people who also collect money but for other charities. This immediately creates a bond through mutual understanding and respect. And, of course, you support each other with a donation.
You also meet people who are caregivers themselves or have lost someone to Alzheimer’s. That is a very vulnerable moment between fellow sufferers, making us both silent for a moment.
A few people dare to make a joke about forgetfulness and to be honest, I appreciate that too.
Now and then, you have a letterbox conversation with someone who is too sick to open the door but still wants to donate. Then, the flyer comes in handy, and I wish them a speedy recovery.
Sometimes, people expect visitors and are very surprised when they see me at their doorstep. “I thought you were my husband/daughter/….” I always say “sorry” and smile apologetically before presenting the collection box.
The front door opened, and I was greeted with cheers. “A collection box, finally!” I had never felt so welcome. The man grabbed a tin can behind the front door and delved for small change. Triumphantly, he picked up a 10 euro note and put it in my collection box with a big grin. He was delighted to donate money at last. I will definitely visit here again next year.
Door policy
Some people close the door again to get money. To keep children and pets inside, or the cold and me outside, all very valid reasons. Often with heartfelt apologies, which is very kind, of course.
Many people leave the front door open while they hunt for cash, even if they have to go all over the house — a nice sign of trust.
One lady invited me to wait inside the hall because she thought it was cold outside. I couldn’t handle such spontaneous hospitality and stayed outside, keeping it cool.
Random observations
Best excuse: “We have our own charities.”
Best door sticker: “No advertising leaflets, please; we already have everything.”
When the dog barks, there is often no one home.
People with a video doorbell usually don’t open the door (you keep hearing the same annoying ringtone as in the commercial).
Bigger houses don’t automatically mean bigger donations.
When the front door opens, you get a glimpse of the residents’ interior, from sleek design to cozy chaos. Is this also a glimpse into the soul of the residents? And what does the entrance of our own house say about us?
Accidents
I hope that this year I’m more lucky than last year. Back then, I had noticed that the handle of the collection box was a little loose at the top. When I was ready to go home at the end of my last round, the handle snapped off. My collection box fell to the ground and broke apart. The precious contents ended up on the sidewalk and street. Thanks to my phone’s flashlight, I managed to recollect all the coins and bills. I felt very awkward because it must have looked very suspect, at least.
Helping out
Many people are familiar with Alzheimer’s disease and consider it an important good cause to support. I am very grateful for all donations, small or large because they bring a better world closer. And I’m glad I can play a small part in that.
Take care and till next time!
Kind regards,
Herman / Scrumpy Dad
